parts.

1st part
I am no precious wall flower ment to rot in this alley for too long if you know what I mean
Surely you would hate me for outrageously admitting the truth
Yet It has been deliriously exciting hasn't it and unbelievably simply
You would doubt me I guess
Now give me your hand
I wont
Why not Patrick?
I wont betray the sermon if I touch you once It will be twice and thrice if you seem to care about feelings and other fellow men
Cut the crap and take me by your side
Dont play the innocent lady
I wont, I promise, I would be as naughty as possible
Well, there goes a patrick turning into some other man you've desired him to be
Want that? What?
Stop explaining
I never did explain anything I just asked a question
But you didn't answer
Was I chosen to be anwered, it seemed as if the dust in the air would have been a better listener to your words
I don't know my beauty
Take that?
Take what for God's sake?
Answers? Do you really want them?
I don't care
I thought so
Where is it?
Where are your pronouns to begin with?
Questions, too much talking done here I wont be around for couple of weeks
Take that rose
Where?
Inside my mind.
You hung that there, what a nice place to choose
At least it can remain intact and fresh .. . as long as I want it to
-Takes the coat leaves-
Leaving we hear the insider voice of a stranger assumed to be the sound of the male character's interior child: Locked me inside my head, I don't want to fret but the time seems to juggle with my ideas. Bruises, never. But time would do its trick. . . I hope...
Woman does the same trick, she is a little gal;
Play with me. . . Don't play with me but play the violin instead but play. . . the game of hearts.
-Door knocks breaking her thinking, the door opens from outside remains opened and moves slowly as if the woman was invited or set free of the room, it is dark outside of the room-
-she stands up, goes to her destination, door is closed silently by her- zoom up her face and a naughty little smile joining the darkness-
2nd part
darkness
voices can be heard
the place is small
like a cubicle
like a closet
we see from up the woman and the man naked
holding each other
looking at themselves
somewhat dirty, as if they had been closed in there
they look up to us, the watchers
they suffer
and cry . . .
zooming out they become tiny and disappear suddenly.

gunlerden biri. . .

Sabah, saat alti civarlari, kendimi aleksle disari attim metroya kadar yuruduK. O yanimdayken etrafimizi kaplayan kucuk buz kitlelerinin farkina varmadim, soguk da degildi evin ici. Hamambocegi ya da cogunuzun bilidgi samsa hallerinde yasayan insanlar icin radyator vardir, soguk yoktur, ben de onlardan biriyim. Ikili olan ve de ikizler olan cogu dusunceden uzak durmaya calistim. Evet, yurudum sadece amacim sigara almak. Aleksi ise yolca ettim;

Have a nice day at work honey,
Gimme a call

Yea I will

Bu cumleleri kuracagim aklima hic gelmezdi. Bu kadar dizi seyretmek ozellikle kafasi guzel zombiler olarak kucuk amerikada prison break damardan almak bana yaramamis olsa gerek. Wazemmes istastonunda donarken korktum, gecenin basiydi bu. Disari cikip cikmamak arasinda tereddut ediyordum. Tipik neptunyen sularda yuzme hareketim bu benim, determinasyonumun olum torpusu. Aleks geldi. Ona kizdim, tek basima kendimi savunamayacagimi biliyor, yalniz kalmamam gerek aslinda oyle yerlerde. Geriliyorum, paranoyagim, pelus bir kuzu olmadan karanliktan korunduguma hala inanmiyorum. Hayallerim var, hayallerimin gucu var. Buyu ve de kelleni ucursunlar aslinda. Hayir, daha yasamadigim bir cocuklugum var simarmaya yeni basliyorum. Bazilari kirkinda azar bazilari otuzunda ben ondokuzumda ve bu gercek bana garip geliyor. Sanki olmamasi gereken bir olaymis gibi, hani ben dogal degilim diyorum, oysa ki cok normal. Digerlerine bakiyorum. Onlar da azmislar aslinda, delirmisler cogu, evet. Ama bir sekilde hayatlarini butun tutmayi beceriyorlar. Ben neden dagitiyorum, suda cozunuyorum, efervesanligim genetik midir? Cocugum da boyle olur mu? Soruyorum. . .

Bir sekilde tartismalarla bakkal onune geldik. Hala kucuk bir prensesi oynamaktan kendimi alikoymadim. Koca sehirde tek tanidigim adamin yaninda uyumaktan aciz biriyim ve de bil bakalim ne yaptim? Bakkala girildi ve kendime sarap aldim. Aleks seksen sent istedi. Sadece metro param var dude diyerek kolayi ona almayi reddettim. Ama sarap daha ucuz geldi ustunde yazdigi fiyattan. Pek sorgulamadim bu durumu. Para ustunu aldim ciktim.

Alex weren't you gonna buy a coke?
Yea I was but you would't give me money
But I wasn't able to now I can go get you some coke
No way I'm going to be seen as a total dumbass if I go back in there
For god's sake take it and buy it unless you want me to look stupid

Seksen sentin hesabi da boylece yapilmis oldu. Hayat garip tabi. Ac kalinca cok daha farkli dusunuyorsun. Liz'lerin evine giden yolu yine bulamadim, kayboldum. Aleks de buna sinsice guldu. Neden mi? Cunku benimle yine oyun oynuyordu. Evi bulabilecek mi oyunu. "Bu kucuk kedi yavrusunu baska yerlere biraksam acaba koklayip bu mekani bulabilir mi?" sorusundan uzak kalan bir yan goremedim bu tavrinda. Apartmana girildi. Herkes ile sicak saatler. . . Uzun suredir gormemistim kucuk amerika'yi, iyi geldi desem yeridir.

Saatler burada gecti. Gri kapili bir kucuk amerika'nin icinde.

Olay akisi mi ariyorsun? Neden bana zaman kavrami senin icin ne sorusunu yonlendirmiyorsun? Iste bu, ruya gibi karman corman olan her surreel detay benim icin zaman, ya da misir gevrekleri. Misir gevrekleri cunku eger ki bir gun ac kalirsam diye onlari alip alip evde diziyorum, uzun sure de bitmemekle kalmayip bir de inatla sut koyunca cogaliyor gibiler. Boyle oluyor bana da, anilari koyunca zamandan mitozla cogaliyor gibiler zamanciklar, gecmis hucreleri saga dizilsin, gelecekler sola, su an'i da bana verin yasayayim bari. . . Diyemiyorum ki, misir gevrekleri sutun icinde dagiliyorlar. Kontrol edemiyorum, bozuk bir omletten daha beter. Ters cevrilmiyor. Yag koysan dahi suzemiyorsun. Sindirmek mumkun mu sabah sabah mideme giren misir gevreklerini?

Buldum, sabah ne yasadigimi buldum. Param yoktu, evet, faks cektim bankaya. Faksi ceken kadin turk, surekli gittigim internet kafenin icinde kendine has "ne kadar az turk, o kadar az sorun" felsefesi gelistirmis bir bayan kendileri. Aslinda gercekten o yilbasi hakkinda benden tek kutlama alacak insan olacakti. Tabi neyi kutladigim pek belli olmuyordu, uzun bir christmas noel karisimi tatilini kutluyordum herhalde yilbasindan daha cok. Ama o calisacakti. Onu da kutlayamazdim bu yuzden. Faks yollandi, kredi kartini kullanabilecegimi biliyordum. Dondugum ve de sabah ayazi fena oldugundan sigara almaktan daha cok sicak olan supermarketlerde isinmayi tercih ettim. Acimasiz bir kat sahibesinin apartman cikisinda "girin!" emri karsisinda butun gune olan sevkim kacti. Aldiklarimi buzdolabina yerlestirmeden yataga girdim. Sicak degildi, erkek yoktu. . . Uyudum, kadinin sesi kulaklarimda cinlayarak. Apartmana girmemeyi hayatimda bu kadar istedigim olmamisti. Sadece o bana oyle yapmami soyledigi icin degil, bunun kacinilmaz oldugunu bile bile, alay ede ede soyledigi icin.

Sabah en guzel kismiydi gunun. Cok fazla isle ugrasmadigim icin benim icin sabah insanlardan kacmak icin bahane yaratiyordu. Gerci sabah saatlerinde cogu insan calisiyordu, o yuzden bana ayiracak vakitleri yoktu. Ama calisan gece de calisiyordu, tatilde de calisiyordu. Kimsenin bana ayiracak vakti yoktu. Bir an dusundum acaba bu sahip oldugum asiri bos vakti onlardan mi caliyorum diye, sanirim onlar da benim yapmam gereken isleri benim yerime yapiyorlardi. Onlar ses cikarmadigi surece bu gizli anlasmaya uymaya karar verdim.

Dun neydi benim icin? Evet, "hic amator olmadigim" gundu. Bunu boyle aktarinca yanlis anlasilabilir, ben cidden hic amator olmadim, yeniyetme olmadim. Sorun burda zaten, eger bir gelisim olsaydi maziye mazi derdim, bir gerileme olsaydi da ayni senaryoyla karsilasirdik. Ama ben dogdum buyudum ve de kaldim. Tanri gibi dogurulmadim ve sonum da yok. Bu tanri'yi cok kisitlamis olsa gerek cunku beni cidden zorluyor. Hep istenilen yerde istenilen sekilde ve sabit durmak zorundasiniz. Rutinlerin krali aslinda tanri ya da sabitligin. Bir sekilde oluveriyor ve oluyor yani. O kadar. Bunu yapan bir insan ise yaratmak icin cok fazla vakte sahip oldugu icin rahatca oturuyor ve de sigarasini icmeye basliyor. Tembel oldugundan degil, dupeduz hakli oldugundan. Yapacak bir sey yok, kendi dunyandasin, didiniyorsun ve de bir bakiyorsun icindeki evrenimsi ucsuz bucaksiz yerlerde bir seyler olusmaya basliyor. Icindekiler arttikca kusuyorsu, bosaltman lazim bunlari da bir sekilde. Midenin tam kaburgayla birlestigi diyafram bolgesinde kucuk bir dunya yesermesini insanlarin cikmasini sana tapmalarini bekliyorsun. Dunyan oda oluveriyor. Zaman kavrami zaten yok. Ne farkim kalmis olabilir ki? Ufak bir tanri olmam icin ne yapmam gerekebilir ki daha? Ben hic yeniyetme olmadim, dogdugum gunden beri yeniyetme degildim. Bunu soyledim dunden ve de bir dizi olay sonunda uyurken gozlerimi hissetmiyor, ensemdeki kaslarim garip calismaya basliyordu... Stres dedim. Gerilmistim.

Su an uyandim, bu yazinin ucuncu gunu olsa gerek. Sirke icinde bekletiyoruz ki tursusu kurulsun kendisinin. Ya da yillanmis sarap. Evet size bundan bahsedecektim. Kadin kokusu, kadin kaslarim, kadin hallerim.

oturdugum senler.

Benim oturdugum yerde atesler yok
Alevler sarmaz sokagi
Adamlar birbirini vurmaz
Soguk ruzgardan baska kimse gecmez benim sokaklardan

Kuru ekmek pesinde kosan adamlardan sadece birkaci

Gorebildi pencerelerden insanlar oldugunu
Insanlarin bu muhitte yasayabildigini
Yasadigini
Soludugunu

Benim oldugum yerde agaclar yok
Agaclar olmadigi icin ya da pek fazla gozukmedikleri icin

Hayat yok
Tek hucreliler var
Yogunlukla parazitler. . .

Kaldirimdan iki uc mutualist yakalar gozlerimiz

Sessizce olmayan agaclarin yasini tutar

Siyah kiyafetleriyle bir kadin. . .

Dogdugum yerde su yok,
Insanlarin ruhu yok,
Icleri sadece su...

Kuru adinda bir kadinim ben
Tanidigim sonralari
Kimligini emdigim
O oldugum

Yerini doldurdugum. . .

Kullarina bahsedilen bir iki cumle daha
Imanin saati bastirdi
Benim "coplugumde" horoz otmez
Benim mahallemde su yok, ruh var. . .

Insanlarin icinde ruh yok. . .

Ruh yok. . .

Su var.

Saat: 12:31
Evimden acilar cikti
Zihnimden ruyalar
Bir sen cikmadin

Demir atmis bu liman icine. . .
Benim barakadan sesler gelir,
Kavgalar edilir
Dayak da var
Istersen bir kulagini daya ve duy. . .

Buradan oraya gelene kadar
Sesler soldu hep
Soldu hep yapraklarim
Tek istedigim. . .

Uzadilar hayatlari
Gereginden fazla yasadilar
Sigara ictiler
Alkol bosalttilar banyolarin icine

Kustular sayisiz kere
Ayildilar
Ayiktilar. . .

Uzadilar cumleler
Egitildiler?
Anlasilmaz oldular
Batak denilen hayat
Iste onun icine girdiler.

Kimsesiz bir sesin acizligi
Kimsesiz bir ben
Koparmissin baglarini
Aklinda oyunlar oynaniyor

Birakma onlari
Onlar; anilar
Diyor. . .

Onlar; sensin.
Kabul et yenilmedin
Kabul et yenemedin
Yemek yemekten baska bir halt edemedin.
Japon yenlerine elini dahi suremedin.
Yalniz geldin yen yen diye satirlar yazdin. . .

Turettin!
Kustular sayisiz kere
Yerlere attilar
Yerlerde donduler. . .

Guzumden baharimdan dort mevsimimden
Bir tek sen ciktin.
Sunger gibi emdim alkolu
Sunger gibi siktilar

Bir tek sen ciktin.

min.

bir berber dukkani, uskudar, iki delikanli, kosele ayakkabilar, gomlek, yaz havasi, egemen tema; erkeklik. . .
recep; simdi sen asik oldun ya -merakla-
recep;hee kocum
recep;abi korkmuyor musun
recep;neden
recep;kaybetmekten
recep;ya bi git isine ya, demediler mi sana asigin gozu kordur birak anlatma, nereme anlayim seni olum ben seviyorum, seviyor
recep;ya abi ne kiziyorsun ya yetti su agresif tavirlarin
recep;bana bak, sen asik oldun mu hic? ne demek biliyor musun sen bunu? damarimda kan duracak mi saniyorsun. . . Keserim gitsin yeter ki o'na dokunulmasin.
recep;recep, oglum, asik olmadim diyorum sana sadece merak ediyorum nasil bir sey oldugunu. Ne cikar anlatsan sonucta saygi duyarim sana bu tarz konularda bilirsin az cok deneyimin var yani
recep;sus sus kopoglu kopek sen bana yasli mi diyorsun lan lavuk keserim kafani
cevreden sesler ;
hisssh gencler ayib oluo ama
recep;bana bak, neden her senaryoda boyle heyecan aranmak zorunda abi bunu anlamiyorum ben; neden bickinlik ya da tepkiler bu kadar onemli.
recep;lan harbi diyosun lan, aferin lan neden karikaturize ediliyoruz biz abi, sosyolog musun lassen?
recep;memduh sevket esendal okuyorum, insanlari analiz etmeyi severim, halk icinden diyalektikleri kullanirim bilhare
recep;yavrum, gel bak, sana aski anlatayim. . .
recep;ulan dovuyordun deminden ademin yamugu, madem anlaticaksin neden gerginlik yaratiyorsun?
recep;hormon, recep, hormon, gerginim. . . damarlarimda gitmeyen birer leke gibi sunmsuler. . . korkuyorum recep. . .
recep;ha oyle desene, e gel peki anlat bakalim.
recep;karagoz hacivat olayina dondurdugum icin senden cidden ozur dilerim recep -kalkip pencereden suzen isiga dogru yuruyerek- , ustume ne geldi bilemiyorum. - yere bakis -Biliyorsun; -duraklama- dengesizim. . . -isiga dogru kafayi dondurus-
recep;dur bi cay soyleyelim, husooo cay getir lan bize, demi iyi olsun bacaklarini keserim kereta yoksa
recep;ayip ettin abi ne zaman cayimdan zarar goryon -aglarcasina-
recep;kes kess asittirileordan -dovse daha iyi olurmuscasina-
recep;anlatsana abi heyecanliyim, tecrubesizim anlayacagin bu konularda bir an once senin gibi deneyimli bir insan olmak istiyorum, evlenmek istiyorum ben ya sanirim, ama ask dedigin nedir ki?
recep;olum bak -caylar gelir- seviomusun? -umarsizca-
recep;he abi -boynunu egerek-
recep;o zaman korkuyorsun
recep;nasil abi?
recep;korkuyorsun iste -ellerini one dogru savurarak-
recep;kaybetmekten di mi abi
recep;he iste oyle birseyler emin degilim -savusturmak icin dercesine-
recep;ucukluyo zihnin
recep;hissetmiyorsun? -saf ve cocuksu eda-
recep;gormuyor
recep;gercek olamiyorsun? -saf ve cocuksu eda-
recep;yoksun
recep;ben sana ne dedim?
recep;yoksun dedim. . .
recep;sus.
recep;asiksin, yoksun. . .
recep cayini bitirirken gorunur, kapiya dogru giden tek bir adam vardir, trasini olmamis bir adam, bir uskudar delikanlisi delirmistir. bu gozlemleri yapan huso ise daha sonrasinda recep abisinin pesinden gitmis nereye gidiyon recebabi demis ancak bir yanit alamamistir. recep abi oylemesine ellerini gozune goturmekte ve de huso'ya rahat birakmasini isaret etmektedir.
huso saskin dukkana girer. recep abi isiga dogru yurur. goruntu; gokyuzu. . . ve beyaz.

The Scamper Method Applied to Human Interaction:

« Scamper-ing » in our personality and in our network
An analysis in character and personality design

Human being, considered as a design, as a living conception with an intelligence redefines and reprograms all his attributes in order to survive. Though it may seem useless to reduce the human being to an object; it follows the same SCAMPER method to overcome « daily problems » . It is a fact that if you can not change the situation nor the material that you're facing with in any given problem, the human tends to take himself as an object and in a way redesigns himself using the SCAMPER method.

It is surely doubtful if such a subject makes part of the common idea of design but it is rather important to underline that the character design is surely a method used by professional writers such as scenarists, novelists or non-professional ones like bloggers. Other than that in most of the cartoon related work the main personality has to be « characterized » in an intelligent way. The way we craft those imaginary personalities is strongly related to our own reality and our own perception of life but nothing denies the ID design as irrelevant of design as falsely confused by many interpreters as being only the design of concrete things in the form of objects.
Following that every notion is a subject of design we are going to take a closer look to the way a human being « designs » his social attitude. Though it may seem absurd we are going to use the headlines of a scenario-like life phase in order to see how the SCAMPER method guides us and our characters in the stories. This approach is close to an observation rather than a creative sequence but as the life phase is « designed » the story shall follow the principles of the SCAMPER method, which is the « product », the story that we would want to sell.
We shall primarily create a conception of a human being in our imagination. Let's think of an ordinary 25 year old masters degree student that lives seperately from his parents and has quite a good life with friends, and let's name him Jack. Now, think that Jack has just been dumped by his girlfriend and is really desperate because he wasn't able to not to think of her. He has passed 3 years of his life with her and now she's gone. Jack can be inside of us, it can be one of us, it can be an imaginary guy that a schizophrenic drew in his sketchbook but the important thing is that Jack can be « reality » and « fiction » at the same time. This created a major problem applying the method to the story because it was hard to choose between a fiction Jack and a real Jack and most of the time the boundaries seem to disappear because Jack is human, fiction or not. At this point this experimental project seems to gain another dimension. Now, we take « life » as a design. Not only Jack is our product as character, his designed life phase also makes part of this product.

The substitution; Jack would always « try to think of something else » in order to get away from the depressive period he has been through. In fact Freud was right, we were trying to replace the first woman of our lives as we were trying to see the potentials of our mate. And Helena was quite like his mother. But anyways he'd rather go work all the night or go drink some beer with friends, try to fill this time gap created by the absence of a lover in his life. Most of the people surely did live this kind of problems and the first thing that comes to mind is to « replace » what has gone. It is a fact that after a long term relationship people tend to feel sad and happy at the same time. Some will go seek for love in other people and some would rather find another life ambition. Substitution of the idea of love and the substitution of the loved one is in both cases considered to be a replacement.

Let's say that Jack did go meet Laura who seemed rather attracted to him. As they were talking about Helena and as Jack was trying to express his feelings at the moment, he burst out into tears and was seeking a shoulder to cry on. As Laura did substitute the rôle of the mother and gave without seeking any rewards this intimacy to Jack, jack relaised that there were other women that were attracted to him. Laura was trying in fact to convince him that there were millions of single women who would love to be with him which in fact is an implicit attempt to make Jack substitute Helena.

The combination; Jack took the advice of Laura and the next day as he called her, he wasn't feeling like meeting or dating someone new. He would not have enough time to get to know someone from the beginning. He can could've substituted Helena with a whore but that wouldn't take away his emotional solitude but only his sexual solitude. Laura was different than Helena, Jack knew it, but as he felt isolated and not strong enough he would enjoy her company « as a friend ». This is the combination that Jack has made, he was face to face with the reality and he had the idea of the substitution coming into his mind but he would not just find another girl friend and stick up with her for another -at least- three years. He just wanted it now and he knew that it wasn't possible to get what he wants just in that moment. Things take time, right? So he combined his wants with his reality and invited Laura for a sleepover. As an emotional guy he would eat ice cream and watch Brigitte Jones with her but as a man he would have slept with her. Things take time, Jack! So he combined, he just kissed her as she was eating ice cream saying her that she looks « cute » when she eats ice cream he laughed leaving Laura surprised. It is in the theory of Hegel that the thesis and the antithesis create a synthesis in every conflict, which is an idea that finds its roots in ancient greek. The changement being the only constant thing in our lives maybe the essence of life is in the idea of the constant conflict between extremities and the resolution is the creation or discovery of a middle-point between these two. This simply is the combination of two ideas. Other than that, referring to psychanalists, the human has the anima and the animus in itself rather than being totally male or totally female. Biologically speaking of combination, we are, in the end, a common product of our father's and our mother's genetical heritage. We already are a combination.

The adaptation; Well, what do you know, Laura and Jack are officially together after a month of rendez-vous and sleepovers. But the thing is Laura is trying to persuade Jack to quit smoking and Jack thinks that Laura would be even more gorgeous if she dyed her hair in red. This situation requires adaptation, she has to adapt herself to Jack and arrange her timetable in order to be able to see him once a week, she has to shave her armpits more often and she has to get a hair dye, but no; she won't do that one yet, it's too soon. But in order to maintain a healthy relationship we know that Laura and Jack desperately need to cope to each other and to find an equilibrum of manners, of timetables, of interests. In order to make this common this has to be reciproque. As it is obvious in our story many evolution theories spoke of the adaptation as the most precious tool that human and other living species had in their hands in order to survive. We adapt ourselves to situations, to people and to the environnement. In fact when a timetraveller comes from the future or from the past the first thing that he must do is to dress up like the way the people dress themselves in that era, if not he would probably get arrested or would be laughed at and noticed. Other than that if I am to be invited to a formal dinner or a costume ball I should respect the dress code in order to enter, which is just another concrete illustration of the adaptation part.

The modification; After having passed the last 7 months together, Jack wouldn't really care if Laura hadn't dyed her hair in red and Laura would even mind the smoke covering the whole apartment, it seems that they are getting more and more used to each other and that is changing the attitudes and perspectives of both on certain things. Like yesterday, Laura surprised Martha saying that she could actually smoke in her office because after all she wasn't that « stranger » to smoke any more since Jack did smoke a lot in the appartment, she got used to it. Certain manners and certain attitudes do change over the time, this modification is due to the perception of a specific human concept in our mind. In one of his plays Sartre described a scenario in which a voyeur was looking through a narrowly opened hotel room door in order to see a woman getting undressed. It is true that when he heard the steps of another person climbing the stairs his perception of what he was doing was right disappeared and he suddenly felt « ashamed » and thought that what he was doing is to be « ashamed » for. The effects of this perception of « another » is a powerful modifyer of the qualification of things. A pleasure can become a sin, a benevolent action can be perceived as deriving from unethical purposes and so on.
Putting other uses; Jack was shopping in a mall one day as he surprisingly saw Helena. What was he going to do? He didn't care if Helena wouldn't talk to him, he wasn't very enthousiastic about talking her neither but destiny guided her in a certain way and they started talking to each other once again. Helena was going to marry next week and asked Jack to help her choose a dress that would please Tom, her future husband. They were getting along great so Jack called her when he needed to find a model for his new project, since they knew each other intimately nude modelling was not a problem for Helena. This is the recycling process of a relationship. An ex is never an ex, like camille said in one of her songs « les ex c'est sex, c'est sexy » (fr. an ex means sex and they're sexy). Humans evolve and change, they are self-forming designs in their head. We have patterns, roles, attitudes and a basic knowledge of how social networks are really constructed so we put ourselves into one specific rôle at a given time and a given situation but this sole utility is not certainly permanent. One can be a father, a boss, a lover, a sex addict and an alcoholic at the same time. We are holograms and depending on the point of wiev we have many utilities as well. The pragmatic approach really survived for long terms over the history of philosophy and in a capitalist material based world this approach to the human as « instrument » or « method » to do, to achieve ambitions is spread all over the world. I can redefine and reuse my contacts and my connections, human relationship titles are not permanent.

Eliminating; Eliminating the alternatives is only possible by making a single permanent and grandiose decision. When Helena marries Tom, she would eliminate all other men to be her husband. This title can change over time with a divorce but since the decision has been made Jack is no longer a candidate for the title of husband of Helena. As we go on we will realize that natural selection theory can be a keyword in this subtitle. Elimination is one of the most primitive rules of our nature. We eliminate the inappropriates; we destroy what we don't or whatever threatens our existence. This reptilian idea still is in the corporate lives that we live. Competition is what makes us progress and in other ways since the change is the essence of life it is the fuel that we need to live. This interactivist or rather conflictual-ist idea is only a perspective but can still be observed throughout many procedures of our modern lives. We need to get better grades than others in a curve system, there is still numerus clausus applied in certain schools and in order to get a profession or to achieve related career purposes one certainly needs to eliminate the others.

Reversing; It is hard to believe but Jack finally broke up with Laura. Surprisingly Helena wasn't doing that well with Tom. She never wanted to be a bride anyways, so she divorced Tom. Luckily Jack and Helena were always in touch. In the end, Jack turns to Helena and they are « surprisingly » still in love. Happy endings are crafted through design. This part of the life phase surely is the part which seems to be more « illusionary » than the other phases the story has been through. That is because the reversal of certain elements or the return of certain things in life is totally « unexpected » and from time to time « unrealizable ». This is the part of the design that leads to a resolution and is certainly the part that completes the « cycle » setting a new plot for a new beginning. This is the phase of the parasites that decompose the flesh and make out of the destroyed « situation » a new hope for new beginnings. The damage that has been done intentionally or unintentionally has to be in a way « absorbed », this is like an excuse, the source of the problem has to be eliminated. We need to excuse or make up for what has been damaged, changed, restructured etc.

mash.

And god seemed to whisper in my ears
BoyI have plans for ya You'd better quit smoking Or you would die soon
Shaking For that man was not used to holy advices
Blaming Philip Morris and all that Kerouac I've read Bukowski and other smokers French gitanes and lovers Painters Home studio workers All of themLaboring As I smoked a puff away.
Puffs away from here was Clément For that he was jealousy For he was agony As a letter and an ex presumably
That man was juggling with fear alone in the corner This man had white hair and juggled with that man And barely was the other one a father because he had virgin doubtsIn his head. . . he kept them Choked. And then vomited? But never freed. . . himself from his virgin thoughts.
Well yes my old man came to visit me too He said
Boy You better get your puffs and leave Coz this house is stinking And the air just won't let us heal So please kid Better stop smokin'
Well then the brazillionaire with whom we talk over that man And who liked this man Came and hibernated In the middle of our discussion. That is why we weren't able to make progress
You know brazillionaires They usually do that They are different than gazillionaires or bazillionaires But surely they seem to zillionate a lot And hibernate.
Then hibernate.
Puffed the woman called Nipsy Nipsy used to puff like for 3 years now She would not mess with people's puff Doesn't ask stuff Doesn't treat you as duffIt was nipsy Totally creepy.
I loved her She said Son Better stop puffing into my eyes I can't bluff when you puff But to love ya I need time and stuff Surely a good hand that I can use to bluff
That was rough Nipsy Rough to live down here on bootsy bay Hope you get dandruffs and get tipsy on your way Lord what a day, a christian antipuff day Handcuffed I pray. . .
Shepherd May lay on that hay She would usually rhyme easily like that What a puff she said to herself Then began the fire With the morning ashore winds Began to plunder the wrecks of the boat to hire Destruction, Mary Abstraction.
Fire engines and then flashes Her head those sounds seldom bashes In two puffs time everything was ashes Ashes into puff

Suus*

Sus!
Eskiler geldiler;
Anılar gibiler.
Değiller.

Sus! Dizilerden çıkma kahramanlar dizine kadar geldiler
İstediğin hayat, aldığın yevmiye ve onunla ne yapacağın, göründüler
Sana verildiler.

Vaat edilen yay burcu, erkeği.
Eskidenmiş…
Anılardan.
O da geldi.

Görülmedi.
Çekemiyorum zamanın boğamadıklarını,
Göremiyorum boğumlarını.

Sarışınları var, var…
Balkondan bakarken dumanları Gökyüzüne çıkmayan
İçeri dolan.
Gitgide boğan
Kadınlar…

Ve insanlar var etrafımda.
Bir dakika dahi yalnız değilim ki…
Sus, bu benim karakterim!
Yazdıklarım internet sitelerinde.

Saçımın okşanmasına o kadar ihtiyacım var ki…
Ben okşuyorum saçları.
Özlüyor muyum şimdiden?
Evet, sanırım bu da işin sırrı

Pastalar, kadınlar ve onların kaçmasına sebep adamlar
Bilemiyorum, bilinmiyor
Sus, balkondan aşağı şarap kadehleri fırlatılıyor,
Gece yarısı.

Birinin gözünü daha çıkardı…
Komşu kadının gözleri,
Karanlıkta bir silüet,
Yalnızlık korkusu…

Gözlerin korkusu,
Ya da silüetlerin.

Çocuksu olanla dostça olan bu gece yarısı,
Kuaförlerde cilt bakımı hakkında bir konuşmayla sona erdi.
Önce kadın kaçıyordu…
Sonra ise seviyor ve duruyor.

Ben kimdim?
Buluşmalar vardı
Adamların boyu pencereme kadar geliyordu.
Bir buçuk günlük uyku demekti,
Tüm bunlar.

Gün geçmiş;
Bilemedim ki…

Gazeteleri alıp yırtmak o kadar cazip ki
Bir gün şizofren olduğumda da beni seveceksin.
Di mi?

Ogeday Celep
8/31 18:31